Not On The Menu
by badly-knitted
Summary: Ianto lies injured, waiting for help to arrive. Written for the prompt 'There was something oddly soothing about watching a bird of prey soaring through the sky in search of its next meal,' at fic promptly.


**Title:** Not On The Menu

 **Author:** badly-knitted

 **Characters:** Ianto, Jack, Owen, Team mentioned

 **Rating:** PG

 **Spoilers:** None.

 **Summary:** Ianto lies injured, waiting for help to arrive.

 **Word Count:** 800

 **Written For:** eerian_sadow's prompt 'Any, any, there was something oddly soothing about watching a bird of prey soaring through the sky in search of its next meal,' at fic_promptly.

 **Disclaimer:** I don't own Torchwood, or the characters. They belong to the BBC.

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There was something oddly soothing about watching a bird of prey soaring through the sky in search of its next meal. The only problem was, Ianto had the rather disturbing impression that it might be considering him for that role, on account of him just lying there, bleeding and unable to move. He really hoped Jack would find him soon.

"How are you doing, Ianto?" Jack's voice came in his ear.

"Aside from the pain and bleeding, just fine. Oh, and there's a bird of prey eyeing me up, I think it might want to eat me. There aren't vultures in Wales, right? I'm pretty sure there shouldn't be, but I'm starting to wonder."

"Hang in there, we're homing in on your signal, should be with you in about ten minutes."

"Yeah, don't go anywhere, Teaboy. Okay?" Owen was being as annoying as usual.

"Yes, because I'm just going to jump to my feet and go running off despite this bloody alien spear pinning me to the ground like a butterfly in a specimen case!" Ianto rolled his eyes even though Owen couldn't see him. What a situation to be in. The only plus point was that the bleeding wasn't too bad, all things considered. The weapons the aliens used had a cauterising effect, presumably because they wanted to disable and capture rather than kill.

Intergalactic slavers, just what they didn't need. The team had made a point of shooting them down with extreme prejudice. If they'd got away, they would just have gone somewhere else on earth and continued trying to take people captive; they were bad news. Their flying Jet Ski things had been pretty cool though. Ianto wished they could have snagged a couple for later use, but the best way of dealing with the slavers was to blow them up. Hit the power unit of their one-person flitters and the whole thing, alien included, vaporised. No mess, no evidence, just the way Ianto liked it. Cleanup had never been simpler.

Still, it would've been nice to go flying up there with that bird of prey. It was still circling; Ianto was pretty sure it was lower now. If it got too close, he'd fire off a warning shot, try to scare it off. He still had his gun at least. He was quite proud of himself, not only for keeping hold of it when the spear hit him in the left shoulder, but for managing to shoot his attacker down. It had been quite pretty when the flitter blew up, kind of like a fireworks display in daylight; showers of coloured sparks, then a loud boom as it blew apart, again and again, components exploding in flashes of bright colour, sparkling particles drifting downwards and vanishing before they hit the ground.

He was starting to feel a bit light-headed, probably from blood loss. How long had it been since Jack told him they'd be with him in ten minutes? His shoulder hurt a lot, making it difficult to concentrate. Seven minutes? Eight?

"You there, Jack?"

"Right here. You should be able to hear the chopper."

Oh. That's what was causing the annoying sound that was disturbing the peace and tranquillity.

"Yeah, I hear it. Do I even want to know where you got a helicopter?"

"It's a loaner from UNIT, quickest way to get to you with medical help; this thing's got everything. How're you holding up?"

"Getting a bit light-headed. Guess I'm bleeding more than I thought."

Anything Jack might have said in reply was drowned out as the helicopter landed a few hundred metres away. The bird of prey was circling further away now. Ianto's eyes had kept tracking it for want of anything else visible to distract himself with. Looked like it had decided to find something a bit more manageable for dinner. Smart bird.

"Hey there. Come here often?"

Jack's head appeared in his line of sight and Ianto smiled.

"Hi, Jack, thanks for stopping by."

"No problem, we were in the neighbourhood."

Owen was there too, Ianto could tell even though the medic was out of his eye line. He was busy assessing Ianto's condition, saying something about a little prick, and hooking up a bag of blood. Ianto ignored him and focussed on Jack. "The bird left. Guess it decided I didn't look very appetising after all."

"I beg to differ," Jack grinned. "You always look good enough to eat to me."

Ianto huffed a slight laugh. "Cheesy pick-up lines. Don't know how you get away with it," he muttered as he was lifted into the chopper. He hadn't even felt the spear being removed. Owen must have slipped something else in with the blood. Closing his eyes, he relaxed. Looked like he'd live to fight another day after all.

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The End


End file.
